The kiss was no surprise, and Tam surrendered to it, opening her mouth for a questing tongue, feeling the electric thrill of first intimate contact. She had never been kissed by a woman before, except for the chaste kisses of her mother. She was pleased by the gentleness of it, the soft smoothness of Jana’s mouth, the scent of cologne and shampoo.
And yes, she was aroused.
She responded not so much to the fact that Jana was a woman, though that fact bothered her less than she might have expected, but to the proprietary way that Jana took Tam’s head in her hands and held her there. Tam considered struggling, just to feel the strength of those hands.
Jana ended the kiss and held Tam away from her, gripping her shoulders. “It’s time for you to slap my face and storm out,” she said.
“I wouldn’t do that. I liked it, though I never thought of myself as a...” she hesitated at the word, “a lesbian”.
Jana’s grin was feral. “No, but you are submissive, and that makes you the natural prey of anyone strong enough to take you.” She picked up Tam’s brandy glass and handed it to her, then took her own glass and tapped it against Tam’s. “To the future.”
They drank. Tam gulped her brandy, needing a drink for one of the few times in her life.
“You have a decision to make,” said Jana. “Actually, it would be a series of small decisions. You have to decide whether or not you want to explore your fantasies by living them. For years you have stared into the pit, wondering what was down there, but unable to descend alone. I could hold the lifeline for you, and lower you down.”
Tam stared at the floor, unable to meet the intensity of Jana’s eyes. “How far?” she asked.
“As deep as you dare, all the way to the bottom perhaps.”
Tam set her glass down, afraid that she would lose her grip and drop it. “I’m scared,” she admitted. “Dreams are nothing like reality. The things I described last night would be painful, probably even dangerous. Everyone dreams of flying, but if I were to jump from a high place I would only fall.”
“I won’t let you fall,” said Jana.
Tam felt Jana’s fingers lifting her chin, and opened her mouth for another kiss. This one was longer, and even more insistent. She didn’t resist as Jana unbuttoned her blouse and slipped a hand inside to cup a breast. Her nipple erected under the cool palm.
“Undress,” Jana whispered into her ear.“I want to see you.”
Tam wanted to display herself.She was tired of the lies and pretenses that the world seemed to thrive on.What better way was there to be honest with Jana?She wanted to be seen and touched by someone who understood.
Yet her fingers were clumsy with her buttons and zippers.Jana impatiently took charge, brushing Tam’s hands out of the way and skinning her down with movements that were swift and rough.
Tam fought a battle with modesty under Jana’s hungry stare, and began to fold her arms across her chest.Jana would have none of that, and held Tam’s hands down at her sides.When she was sure that Tam would no longer try to cover herself, Jana released the girl’s hands and began to examine Tam’s breasts, kneading the flesh and tweaking the nipples into hard buttons.
“They are rather small, I’m afraid,”Tam apologized.
“They are perfect,” Jana purred.“High and firm, and the nipples are so pale!”
Like a blind woman, she traced the outline of Tam’s body with her fingers, greeting each new discovery with delight. Abruptly, she spun Tam around and bent her forward.
“Put your hands on the bookshelf,” she commanded softly. “Spread your legs.”